Author: OSIRO NYAR KEPHA

 

I hurt.

Munch crunch.

I am scared.

Munch slurp.

 

I am worried.

Munch crunch.

I am angry.

Chomp slurp.

 

I am disappointed.

Gobble crunch.

I am terrified.

Gulp burp.

 

I am broken-hearted.

Munch, crunch, slurp.

I hurt.

Chomp Chomp.

 

I eat away my pain.

Am I lighter?

I gobble down these suffocating emotions.

Am I better?

 

I am heavier.

I am bloated and bitter.

Can I eat my pain away?

Or is my pain slowly eating me away?

 

 

Warm arms drew me close.

Warm arms held me near.

Warm hands cuddled me tenderly.

Warm hands comforted me.

Warm hands embraced me dearly.

I melted like butter in the oven.

I am refreshed, rejuvenated by these here warm hands.

 

 

It is boiling.

It is simmering.

It is whistling.

It is under pressure.

 

Keep off!

 

This pressure cooker is overheating.

It has reached the breaking point.

It is on the verge of blowing up.

So don’t push me over the edge.

 

You will regret it!

 

 

Farewell and Godspeed.

Goodbye.

Your voyage is over.

You have finished your race.

 

Oh! It hurts profoundly to acknowledge your sudden departure.

 

It tears our heart out.

It makes us tear up.

It is heart-wrenching.

It is heart-rending.

 

Letting go of a loved one is painful.

Bidding farewell to the cherished one is heartbreaking.

We are grief-stricken.

We are heavy-hearted.

 

Fare thee well.

Thank you for sharing your life with us.

Thank you for touching our hearts.

Thank you for painting our lives with your lovely personality.

 

We will miss you, dearly.

 

 

It feels good.

It is rejuvenating.

It is awesome.

It is lovely.

 

I am in the spotlight.

I am appreciated.

I am a celebrity.

I am an object of admiration.

 

I smile.

I laugh.

I soar.

I strut.

 

Now stop!

 

I have smelled the roses.

I have enjoyed the recognition.

I have the trophy, it is lovely. I appreciate it.

I have your attention, and I don’t take it for granted.

 

Now stop!

 

I sell my trophy.

I get off the stage.

I withdraw from the public eye.

I put on anonymity.

 

Why do I efface my achievements?

 

I set aside my accomplishments, for my life is in the grind.

I grow in the repetitive drudgery of sharpening my skill.

Notoriety, glory, and fame are but for a moment.

My real life is out of the spotlight, that is where I blossom.

 

I work; I push myself daily. 

My glory is in the grind.

I am not mighty in the ring.

I am a fierce warrior in the grind.

 

I toil.

I sweat.

I labour.

I stretch.

 

I push myself.

I strive to improve my skills.

I work my guts out daily.

It is my life, and I have come to love it.

 

Step by step, I become a better version of myself than I was yesterday.

So, I grind and grow!

 

 

Go down the rabbit hole, but be careful.

Beware!

Watch your back.

Be on your toes.

For you never know what might jump on you.

 

Whatever glitters is a mirage.

Beware!

Tread carefully, for it is hypnotic.

It is a deadly trap.

Keep a firm hold on yourself.

Don’t accept anything tantalizing.

 

Resist the seductive things, that drop before you.

Keep your mind sharp and aware.

Think about what you are thinking.

Hunt down and destroy every deceptive thought.

Think twice when the deal is too good.

 

Let this be your mantra.

Hold it tight, for it is your lifeline.

It will save you from the treacherous snares that lie in wait.

Never forget that a rabbit hole is a dangerous place. 

Things are not what they appear to be.

 

Weigh each information carefully, calmly, and deliberately.

You will thus unravel each lie.

Exposing it and neutralizing it.

You will thus be able to navigate with ease, the rabbit hole of the human mind.

 

 

Oh!

It is enthralling.

It is heady.

It is intoxicating.

 

I am melting.

I am lost.

I am slipping.

I have drowned in this vast ocean of affection.

 

Move closer, dearest object of my desire.

Let me hold you.

Let me embosom you.

Let me drink you.

 

Wow!

I melt in your embrace.

I fly in your presence.

I want you near.

 

I cuddle you close, my dear vanilla hot chocolate.

You do have a way of satisfying my sweet tooth!

 

 

 

I woke up for me today.

I stretched and stood tall for me.

I looked at me, myself, and I straight in the face.

I decided that I like myself today.

Yes, I like myself.

I am kind to me.

I love myself.

Oh yes! Today I am glad to be alive.

 

 

Is it worth it, all this toil?

That burdens me so.

This labour that takes its toll, making me recoil.

I can stand tall no more.

 

Is it worth it, all these things?

They fight for my attention.

They tear apart my spleen.

Each one dons a costume, to rival the others’ sheen.

 

They all cry out, “it is an emergency!”

Is it all that serious, all these things?

That make me cringe and desperately cling.

I hold on tight, with the strength I bring forth.

 

I delve within my heart to release this strength.

I keep digging deeper for treasure.

Yes, these precious golden nuggets of peace of mind, a rested soul and tranquil joy.

The mine of my life and mind are here by almost barren.

 

Constant emergencies and extremely urgent matters have overexploited my mine.

 

 

Flickering lights.

Calling, beckoning.

Flickering lights.

Swaying dancing.

 

It comes closer.

It grows larger.

Optical illusions.

Receding, evaporating.

 

Lights are flickering no more.

Glaring only.

Do ignore.

The blinding lights.

 

Light moving away.

It grows dimmer.

Sweet dreams.

Now adrift.

 

 

It is time.

So it seems, from the signs I see.

Is it time?

I wonder, from the storms raging within me.

Well, it must be time from this unceasing song.

The symphony that I cannot seem to quiet snuff out or quench.

This beautiful song of life.

 

 

Rise and fall.

Come forth and recede.

Rise and ebb.

It is the tide of my life.

 

Mourn and groan.

Sigh and frown.

Mirthless laugh.

This heart is so weary.

 

Stand, stagger.

Tripping, treading.

Oh, grasp, tether.

This time no going under, I declare!

 

 

I cradle you.

I enclose you in the palm of my hand.

I keep you close to my heart.

I keep you with my most precious belongings.

You are never an arm’s length away.

You whisper sweet nothings in my ear.

I caress you tenderly.

My dear cell phone.

What am I without you?

 

 

Bitterness and resentment.

What an insidious hidden root.

You pollute my well.

You poison my water.

 

You sneak in and destroy my garden.

You plant tares amongst my wheat.

You are a highway robber, waylaying, defrauding, pillaging me.

You rob, hurt, and leave me for dead.

 

Oh! But I have woken up now.

 

I see you for what you are.

You will wreak havoc no more in my garden.

I annul the covenant we made in the past.

We are no longer a pair; I dissolve our union.

 

I want you near no more!

 

I take back my mind.

I take back my heart.

I take back my life.

I take back my future.

 

I am free to live again.

I am lighter now.

I have shaken off the heavy cloak of bitterness and resentment.

I am unchained, liberated from my oppressive, cruel slave master.

 

 

Can I go there?

Can I venture there?

Is it OK?

Am I enough?

 

If not, what can I do to fill in the blanks?

 

Oh! What bliss to find out that I am enough.

The person I am is enough and able.

Yes! I am valuable and priceless.

So, dear me, don’t dim your light.

 

Let your light shine, glow and grow! 

 

 

Life hurts.

I have tasted it.

Life hurts.

It has wrecked me.

 

I dare not hope.

I dare not dream.

Can I hope?

Should I dream?

 

Life hurts.

Oh! But it is so beautiful.

Life hurts.

It’s a rose amongst the thorns.

 

I will hope.

I will dream.

I will push past the pain.

I will not give up, despite the adversity.

 

I will keep on smelling the roses in spite of the painful thorns.

 

 

Hey you! fear not.

You are worth caring for, my dear.

You are worth cherishing.

You are worth loving.

Relax, don’t condemn yourself.

I do love you!

 

 

I love this feeling.

The way the breeze gently caresses my brow.

I love this warm feeling.

The way the sun rays kiss my tired face.

 

I like this buzz, this constant hum of activity around me.

I like the way spring, gently, steadily brings back to life, the seemingly dead nature.

The sleeping nature around me awakens from their winter slumber.

I like the way nature yawns and stretches and wakes up.

 

I love these different shades of green and the myriad colours splashed over the landscape.

They paint a masterpiece for my cynical eyes to behold.

I breathe in the fresh, crisp air, lo and behold I am now emerging, awakening.

I come forth from the cold, hard recess of my frozen mind.

 

I shade off the ice of strife, the cobwebs of doubt and disbelief.

I bask in the warm rays of love and my heart blossoms with hope.

 

 

That, I may be refreshment.

That, I may be warmth from the biting cold of indifference.

That I may be nourishment, feeding the weary worn out soul.

Oh! I am empty, do fill me to the brim.

That, I may overflow with healing waters.

Refreshing waters that are gushing forth to quench the parched soul.

 

 

A lone ranger, I am sometimes.

A bulldozer, I am not.

A trailblazer, I am often.

A sluggish snail, I am sometimes.

A terrified, discouraged failure I deem myself often.

 

Oh, yet in all this, I still grab on and hold tight to hope.

 

I now know that, though I rise and keep falling, I won’t give up.

For the beauty of it, is that, as I fall, I rise again and again.

I rise despite the fall.

I rise in spite of the fall.

I rise because of the fall.

 

Thanks to the fall, I rise higher and stronger!