Enjoy the moment.
Relish the journey.
Inhabit the process.
It takes time to smell the roses.
Be gentle with yourself.
Be kind to yourself.
I have heard the above words over and over again.
Yet, they always seem to miss the mark.
The restlessness.
The anxiety.
The “what do they think about me”?
The self-bashing.
The self-loathing.
The self-sabotaging.
These dark thoughts and forebodings have wrung me dry.
Oh! Please simplify it for me.
Do tell me how to get out of this oppressive, suffocating labyrinth.
I am exhausted from fighting with myself.
Help!
I so want to change.
I close my eyes.
I take a deep breath.
I slowly exhale.
I let my body unwind.
I look outside at the winter morning that is awakening.
Fragile tender shoots stand despite their frailty, defying the cold.
I finally understand.
Moment by moment, minute by minute, second by second.
Every single breath I take is a victory.
I will stand where I am, with the little strength I have.
I will acknowledge and celebrate every tiny victory.
I will keep on crawling, staggering, and inching forward.
I am still here despite the winter blizzards that almost froze me to death.
My soul stands worn out and cold but holding on.
It is a precious victory for me.
I am here in this moment.
I am alive.
I will thrive!